One Rant, Hold the Cheese

I've noticed rants popping up on several other blogs, so I've decided to give one a go. Today I will be discussing  the pains of working in the field of food service. I am currently employed at the College sandwich shop,and though I normally find no fault with my job, some of the people I'm forced to serve are unimaginably frustrating. The type of frustrating that makes me wish that I had arsenic at hand to mix in with their mayonnaise.

Now there are typically three different categories of people who drive me crazy. The Ignorant Imbeciles, the Mean Mumblers, and the Phonies.

Let's start with the Ignorant Imbeciles. I know this seems like a rather harsh title but I find it to be pretty accurate.  These are the people who come up to the counter and ask me to make a sandwich, but they know absolutely nothing about the sandwich making process. They don't even know what basic ingredients are for making a sandwich. I've had people ask me what tuna salad is, what buffalo sauce tastes like, and there was even one girl who made me hold up a bottle of Italian dressing to see what it looked like. It's a sandwich shop people! If you don't know what simple sandwich making materials are then don't come to my shop.

Next, I'd like to berate the Mean Mumblers. These are the people who talk so softly, or quickly, or illegibly that I have to ask them again and again what in the world they want. I usually wouldn't mind that much, since I myself have a tendency to mumble sometimes, but these people will respond rudely, as if it's my fault that they couldn't form a clear, concise sentence. It's never a good idea to be mean to the people who make you're food, but Mean Mumblers obviously haven't figured this out.

The last group of sandwich shop customers that get under my skin are the Phonies. I don't call them that because they're fake, though they very well may be. I'm actually referring to the fact that throughout the entire sandwich making process, they keep a cell phone glued to their ear and blabber away. When you need to get their attention all you can do is stand there and stare at them until they snap out of their precious conversation. These people will often just stop long enough to quickly blurt out their desired sandwich composition and return to ignoring me. When this happens, I don't worry about making them a decent sandwich. If they aren't going to give me any respect, then they shouldn't respect any in return. If I can't remember everything they wanted when they blurted out their order, then I just leave the sandwich as is, throw it on a plate, and watch as the Phonie grabs it and walks away without so much as a thank you. At most I might get a quick head nod.

So just a warning to all, if you fall into any of these categories, be careful when eating your next sandwich.